I wrote this story in 1996 and updated it in 2011. I hope you like it.
MY CHRISTMAS STORY
by
Julia Benitez
Sullivan
At this time of the year I get a lot of comments about my
birthday. Some people express delight when they discover I was born on
Christmas Day, but the most frequent response is “how awful” it must be for me.
They say my birthday must get lost in the Christmas rush and that I must have
felt cheated at a child. When I reply that being a Christmas baby isn’t awful,
that I have many happy memories and have never felt cheated, I get the
impression that they assume I’m just being a good sport.
But the
truth is that I feel blessed to have been born on Christmas and credit my
family, especially my parents, for making me feel special.
My parents
didn’t have a lot of money. They were farm laborers who worked hard to provide
a good home, good food and the basic necessities. But no matter how tight
things might have been, they made sure we had a Christmas tree. Sometimes we
had a small tree that was placed on top of a coffee table, other times the tree
was bigger. We even had an artificial tree that was handed down to us – that
one lasted several years and I was glad when my parents finally threw it out.
To this day it isn’t Christmas or my birthday without a fresh, beautiful tree.
My husband, son and I have established a tradition of visiting a tree farm to
select our tree, drink hot chocolate or Wassail, and maybe take in a hay ride.
But back then, even thought the town we lived in billed itself as the Christmas
Tree Capital, we used to go to our neighborhood grocery store to pick out a
tree from the parking lot.
Our
presents were things we needed – underwear, warm clothing and such. The toys I
received came from my older brothers and sisters. I’m the youngest of six and
there is a 20-year age difference from my oldest brother Tommy and me. I didn’t
get a lot of toys, but if I missed them then, I certainly don’t remember it
now. What I do remember is the Suzy Homemaker dishwasher I got one year from my
sister Thelma, my first bike, a red four-wheeler, that my brother Tommy gave
me, even though he had his own children to purchase gifts for that year, and
two beautiful Asian dolls from Vietnam that I wish I had taken better care of
and saved because my brother Arturo, who survived the war only to be killed
later by a drunken driver back home, brought them home for me.
My sister
Helen (who’s seven years older than me and the second youngest in the family)
used to surprise me in the summer with birthday gifts, just because. Helen gave
me my first birthstone ring and other jewelry and took me to have my ears
pierced when I was 16. My father didn’t
like that gift, but I sure did!
But the
best gift I ever got was from my parents. It is a gift that is still with me,
even though my parents have both passed away. Their gift was to make me feel
that the entire holiday was in celebration of my birthday. Yep, me and J.C.
How many
children have entire cities decked out for their birthdays? I had a vacation
from school for my birthday, beautiful decorations, Christmas carols, parades
and a Posada that always ended at my
house with a magical celebration on Christmas Eve. People seemed to be nicer
and happier (they still do) and we had lots of company, wonderful treats, and
special Masses at church.
My birthday
season would start the week after Thanksgiving. Papa would take me for a drive
downtown. He’d point out all the decorations and say, “Hey, they’re already setting
up for your birthday.” Of course I knew that the decorations and activities
weren’t about me, but rather something much bigger and more wonderful. But I
couldn’t help feeling a part of it anyway.
Oh, and I
always had a birthday party – the Traditional Surprise Birthday Party. It was
held the Saturday right after school let out. Mom continued “surprising” me
with these parties until I finished college and moved away from home. There
weren’t a lot of kids from school at those parties, but our home was filled
with friends and family and my birthday parties were a lot of fun. That’s also
when I opened my birthday presents – socks, underwear and other necessities. On
Christmas Day, mama made sure the family sang Happy Birthday around the table
before dinner.
After I
left home, every year, no matter how far away I was, the first call I’d get on
Christmas morning was from mama, singing Happy Birthday. She continued this new
tradition every year until the year she died. I still miss that phone call, or
better yet, hearing her sweet voice in person.
There was
one Grinch at Christmas, even in my family. The Grinch was my tia Lupita, an
aunt who always managed to find the same card (maybe she bought a whole case
one year). The card had a candle burning from both ends and said “Happy
Birthday/Merry Christmas.” But she also was the one who organized the Posadas, so, as far as Grinches go, my
tia Lupita wasn’t so bad and her cards are something to chuckle over now.
Posada, is the Spanish word for
Procession. This traditional, Catholic Christmas celebration takes place for
nine nights, and depicts the story of Mary and Joseph seeking shelter in
Bethlehem. Each night, we would meet at a friend’s home, half of our group
would proceed to the home’s front door singing that we were seeking shelter,
another group inside the home would reply, also in song, that there was no room
for us. Then we’d all gather for refreshments.
This took
place at a different home each night until Christmas Eve, on that night the
Holy couple finally found shelter and were let in the home, there the baby
Jesus was laid in a nativity scene, prayers were said and then we celebrated
with refreshments of hot, Mexican chocolate, finger sandwiches, tamales,
pastries and candies. That last night was always held at our home. Later that
night, after our guests had left, we’d go to Midnight Mass.
We’ve lost
some of those traditions over the years, mostly because we moved so far away
from our closest friends and family. But we’ve established our own traditions.
In addition to the Christmas tree outing, which is a day-long affair, we take
drives to look at all the decorations in neighborhoods and cities, we go to
Christmas parades and festivals, get together with friends and sing lots of
Christmas carols. We celebrate Christmas with a formal dinner on Christmas Eve,
and open one gift. On Christmas morning, when Santa’s gifts are under the tree,
it’s all about our son. Then we go to brunch to celebrate my birthday, just the
three of us unless we have company at Christmas that year.
Even after
all these years, I still feel special at Christmas. That’s the gift from my
parents.
The End
2011 – Our celebration has evolved over the years, now our
Christmas Eve dinner includes a modified Advent Wreath, where we remember our
loved ones who we have lost over the years. In this way, we keep them alive in
our hearts and memories. I read my story and the essay, One Solitary Life,
written by Jim Bishop. We still have a live tree in our home each year, but
it’s been a long time since we visited a Christmas tree farm – mostly because
there aren’t any close to our home in deep South Texas. Our son, James, is now
25-years-old and says Christmas is his favorite holiday. I believe that he will
continue some of our traditions and add some of his own as the years progress.
I am blessed
to celebrate my birthday with the best Christmas present our family has ever
received, my baby niece, Regan Elizabeth Akst, born on Christmas Day 2010. This
year, she celebrates her first birthday and I hope that she feels as blessed
throughout the years as I have felt. I am sure she will because she has
wonderful parents – Jason and Becca, aunts, and grandparents who will help her
feel special and blessed. Reagan is my sister Helen’s first grandchild and
guess what? Reagan had a half-year birthday celebration in June thanks to her
aunt Lisa and ama Helen. Lucky girl! Happy Birthday Reagan! See you soon! Love, tia
Julie
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| Helen, Julie & Thelma |
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| Julie's Birthday 2012 |
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| Julie & Becca at Grandma Elena's home |
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| Julie & Jamie (1 month) |
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| Reagan at 4 months. |
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| Jamie, Becca and Lisa (holding Reagan) |
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| Julie is the little one, with Helen smoothing Julie's hair. Don't know the other girl. |
